Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Thank you
Thank you to everyone who has donated bears, or even just offered moral support. Our goal is have 200 bears by June 1st. Please continue to help me make this project a success.
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Collected Teddy Bears will be distributed to Siblings who have lost their baby brother or sister due to miscarriage, stillbirth, or neonatal death.
Harrison
Zachary kissing his baby brother
Lessons Learned
A child who loses a parent is called an orphan, but there is no word for a parent who loses a child because there is no word great enough to express the loss. No doubt that losing a child goes against everything in nature. It upsets the balance of our lives and we are left wondering "why?". I can tell you, however, that it does get better. You will never forget, or fill that void, but you learn to appreciate everyday things maybe just a little more. But that is a choice, you have to make the choice to turn this horrible situation into something beautiful. You can do that by volunteering, painting a picture, journaling, or even befriending others who are also going through the same kind of loss. Just remember grief is a journey, some days are better than others. I also ask myself "What would my son have wanted for me?" Im pretty sure he would want me to be happy and to help others. I may have to had to give up his body, but what I kept was the tenacious spirit in which he entered this world, and the quiet gracefulness in which he left this world. Those are the things I keep with me and I express them in my daily actions, by how I treat others or kiss my oldest son goodnight or even just my perspective on certain situations.
So if you are experiencing the lost of a child ( and it is an experience) then I urge you when you can, to remember the things you have gained, and how you can improve your life or the lives of others. I know that may sound silly to say that you have gained something from losing a child, but its true ( at least it is true for me).
One thing that helped me was I had to come to the realization that God ( or whoever you believe in) gave me the baby I needed. Of course I would have loved to have a healthy baby, who wouldnt? I had asked God to give us a baby, and he did. He gave me my son and he was exactly the baby I was supposed to have. I dont see it as a punishment, but rather a privilege. God knew we were strong enough to deal with this sort of loss and we would be able to make something wonderful come out of it. Its been almost 2 years since Harrison passed away, and I can still remember those 3 days with him very clearly. I think about him often, but never with sadness only with the joy and the love that he gave to our family. He was an amazing little baby and I will continue to think of him as nothing other that.
So if you are experiencing the lost of a child ( and it is an experience) then I urge you when you can, to remember the things you have gained, and how you can improve your life or the lives of others. I know that may sound silly to say that you have gained something from losing a child, but its true ( at least it is true for me).
One thing that helped me was I had to come to the realization that God ( or whoever you believe in) gave me the baby I needed. Of course I would have loved to have a healthy baby, who wouldnt? I had asked God to give us a baby, and he did. He gave me my son and he was exactly the baby I was supposed to have. I dont see it as a punishment, but rather a privilege. God knew we were strong enough to deal with this sort of loss and we would be able to make something wonderful come out of it. Its been almost 2 years since Harrison passed away, and I can still remember those 3 days with him very clearly. I think about him often, but never with sadness only with the joy and the love that he gave to our family. He was an amazing little baby and I will continue to think of him as nothing other that.
About Me
- Little Angels
- I am 26 years old. Married with two beautiful children on earth and two beautiful children in heaven.
Me holding Harrison in the NICU
My husband and I when they first brought Harrison to our room
Me with my son Zachary and Harrison